Thursday, September 29, 2005

Night of the Day of the Dawn of the Son of the Bride of the Return of the Revenge of the Terror of the Attack of the Evil, Mutant, Alien, Flesh Eating

Full title: Night of the Day of the Dawn of the Son of the Bride of the Return of the Revenge of the Terror of the Attack of the Evil, Mutant, Alien, Flesh Eating, Hellbound, Zombified Living Dead Part 2: In Shocking 2-D

Dir. "Lowell Mason", 1991

This is Night of the Living Dead with the audio re-dubbed, plus some silly-ass "bonus" scenes. It's sub-MST3k at best, but it has a couple moments.

The best thing about this movie is what it says about the source material. While it's true that having your work parodied does not automatically mean that it's a classic (again, see MST3k), I actually saw this before I saw Night of the Living Dead and it didn't ruin it for me. That is, it's a better movie to actually enjoy than it to make fun of.

Favorite moment: "I'm gonna wiggle a board. This one'll do. Bulabulabulablablubula." This had us ROLLING for some reason, and it DID ruin that particular scene in the original for me, forever after.

Hell of the Living Dead

Dir. Bruno Mattei, 1980

This is a bad movie. Bad, but not unwatchable. It follows a group of loutish soldiers and the two journalists they've picked up through the jungles of New Guinea on their mission to do...something. They shoot a lot of zombies, drive a jeep, and establish their patriarchal relationship with the primitive tribesmen through a bit of "nude anthropology". It's not exactly original, but it moves through it's video game-like structure (i.e. the jungle level, the house level, the factory level) at a pretty decent clip.

Today, Bruno could probably defend some of his moves under the post-sampling/mashup aesthetic, for example the preponderance of National Geographic-style footage that he clumsily cut in and the fact that he outright jacked the music that Italian synth-prog band Goblin did for Romero's movies for his soundtrack. His directorial pseudonym is "Victor Dawn", and the even the soldiers' uniforms are identical to those of the cops in Dawn of the Dead.

Contribution to the zombie canon: Mattei frames the film with some explication of the zombies' origin, and it's actually pretty good. Instead of the zombies being the result of the dark-skinned natives' hoodoo (as seems to be standard for Fulci and many other jungle-cannibal-zombie-holocaust movies of the 70s), it turns out that they were created by the Western military-industrial complex to depopulate the Third World and presumably free up their resources for the taking. Cue cuts to hilarious U.N. scenes during the climactic carnage.

Favorite moment: Aside from the nude anthropology and bad English-over-Italian dubbing, I liked the dvd interview with Bruno Mattei (titled "Hell Rats of the Living Dead", of course). It just goes to show you that a hack who has the distinguishedness of age, a nice suit, a melodic Italian accent is still a hack. However, though he opens with the statement that all fifty or so of his films are his children, he ends by admitting that he doesn't really like his movies anyway...though he can see why Quentin Tarantino does.

Zombie movies we have yet to acquire

Please recommend any we've overlooked, or get in touch if you might be able to lend us a copy of an obscure movie.

Night of the Creeps
Oh, No! Zombies!!!
Resident Evil: Apocalypse
Rise of the Undead
Shatter Dead
Sugar Hill
Video Dead
Zombie Flesh Eater
Zombie! vs. Mardi Gras

Zombie movie checklist

The dedicated faculty and adjuncts of Zomploitation have studied the following zombie movies:

All You Need is Brains
American Zombie
Automaton Transfusion
Awaken the Dead
Bad Taste
Beneath the Surface
The Beyond
Biker Zombies from Detroit
Bio Zombie
Black Demons
Blood of the Beast
Bone Sickness
Bowery at Midnight
Boy Eats Girl
Brain Dead
Burial Ground: The Nights of Terror
The Cabinet of Dr. Caligari (Reviewed 10-6-05)
Carnival of Souls (Reviewed 6-12-06)
Cemetery Man (Reviewed 10-1-05)
The Children
Children Shouldn't Play With Dead Things
Choking Hazard
Chopper Chicks in Zombietown
City of Rott
City of the Living Dead
The Crazies
The Crazies (2010)
Dawn of the Dead
Dawn of the Dead 2004
Day of the Dead (Reviewed 3-7-06)
Day of the Dead 2008
Day of the Dead 2: Contagium
Day X
Days of Darkness
Dead Alive/Braindead
Dead and Breakfast
Dead and Deader
The Dead Hate the Living
Dead Heat (Reviewed 10-1-05)
Dead Meat
Dead Moon Rising
The Dead Next Door (Reviewed 10-6-05)
Dead Noon
The Dead One (Blood of the Zombie)
Dead Snow
Dead Summer
Death Metal Zombies
Diary of the Dead
Die and Let Live (Reviewed 5-2-09)
Die You Zombie Bastards!
Document of the Dead
Don't Watch This
Dorm of the Dead
Electric Zombies
Enter...Zombie King
Erotic Nights of the Living Dead
Evil (To Kako)
Feeding the Masses (Reviewed 3-4-07)
Fido (Reviewed 9-27-07)
Flesh for the Beast
Flesh Freaks
Flight of the Living Dead: Outbreak on a Plane
Forest of the Dead
The Forever Dead (Reviewed 5-2-09)
Gangs of the Dead
Garden of the Dead
Ghost Lake
The Ghouls (Reviewed 5-2-09)
The Grapes of Death (Reviewed 3-4-07)
Graveyard (Reviewed 5-2-09)
Graveyard Alive
Hard Rock Zombies (Reviewed 6-9-06)
Hell of the Living Dead (Reviewed 9-29-05)
Hell's Ground/Zibahkhana
Hide and Creep (Reviewed 1-15-07)
Hood of the Living Dead (Reviewed 6-4-06)
Hot Wax Zombies on Wheels (Reviewed 3-4-07)
The House by the Cemetery
House of the Dead
House of the Dead 2
I Eat Your Skin (Reviewed 3-11-06)
I Walked with a Zombie
I Was a Zombie for the FBI
I, Zombie
The Incredibly Strange Creatures Who Stopped Living and Became Mixed-Up Zombies
Island of the Dead
Jack Brooks: Monster Slayer
Killing Spree
King of the Zombies (Reviewed 3-10-06)
Land of the Dead (Reviewed 10-2-05)
The Laughing Dead
Let Sleeping Corpses Lie (Reviewed 10-2-05)
Living a Zombie Dream
Living Dead Girl
The Mad
Mansion of the Living Dead
Masters of Horror: Dance of the Dead
Masters of Horror: Homecoming
Meat Market
Meat Market 2
Messiah of Evil (Reviewed 10-3-05)
Michael Jackson - Thriller (music video)
Motocross Zombies from Hell
Mulva, Zombie Ass Kicker
My Dead Girlfriend
My Boyfriend's Back
Necropolis Awakened
The Night Evelyn Came Out of Her Grave (Reviewed 10-1-05)
Night of the Comet
Night of the Day of the Dawn of the Son of the Bride of the Return of the Revenge of the Terror of the Attack of the Evil, Mutant, Alien, Flesh Eating, Hellbound, Zombified Living Dead Part 2: In Shocking 2-D (Reviewed 9-29-05)
Night of the Dead / Leben Tod (Reviewed 5-2-09)
Night of the Living Dead
Night of the Living Dead 1990
Night of the Living Dead 3D
Night of the Living Dorks (Reviewed 4-7-06)
Nightmare City (Reviewed 11-3-05)
Nudist Colony of the Dead (Reviewed 6-12-06)
Oasis of the Zombies (Reviewed 6-12-06)
Orgy of the Dead
Otto, or Up with Dead People
Peaches featuring Iggy Pop - Kick It (zombie music video directed by George Romero)
Plaga Zombie: Mutant Zone
The Plague of the Zombies
Planet Terror
Platoon of the Dead
Porn of the Dead
Pot Zombies
The Quick and the Undead (Reviewed 1-27-06)
Rabid Grannies (Les Memes Cannibales)
Raiders of the Damned
Raiders of the Living Dead (Reviewed 3-4-07)
Redneck Zombies
Re-Penetrator (Reviewed 6-12-06)
Resident Evil
Resident Evil: Afterlife
Resident Evil: Apocalypse
Resident Evil: Extinction
The Return of the Living Dead (Reviewed 5-21-06)
Return of the Living Dead 2 (Reviewed 5-21-06)
Return of the Living Dead 3
Return of the Living Dead 4: Necropolis (Reviewed 6-8-06)
Return of the Living Dead 5
Revenge of the Living Dead Girls
Revolt of the Zombies (Reviewed 3-12-06)
Rise of the Undead
Rome Against Rome
SARS Wars: Bangkok Zombie Crisis
The Serpent and the Rainbow
Severed: Forest of the Undead
Sexy Nights of the Living Dead
Shaun of the Dead
Scooby-Doo on Zombie Island
Shadow: Dead Riot (Reviewed 3-4-07)
Shadow of the Dead
Shatter Dead
Shock Waves (Reviewed 10-9-05)
The Signal
The Snake People (Reviewed 3-12-06)
Song of the Dead
Stacy: Attack of the Schoolgirl Zombies (Reviewed 6-12-06)
The Stink of Flesh
Survival of the Dead
Teenage Zombies
Terror Creatures from the Grave (Reviewed 10-1-05)
They Came Back/Les Revenants
28 Days Later
28 Weeks Later
Undead (Reviewed 4-9-06)
Undead or Alive
Vampires vs. Zombies
Vengeance of the Zombies
The Veil
The Video Dead
White Zombie
Wicked Little Things
Wild Zero (Reviewed 10-3-05)
Wiseguys Vs. Zombies
Zombi 2
Zombi 3 (Reviewed 3-13-06)
Zombi 4 (Liveblogged 3-17-06 on the Engine, now defunct.)
Zombi 5
Zombie Aftermath
Zombie Campout
Zombie Death House
Zombie Honeymoon (Reviewed 6-4-06)
Zombie Island Massacre
Zombie Lake (Reviewed 10-1-05)
Zombie Night
Zombie Nightmare (Reviewed 6-12-06)
Zombie Planet
Zombie Strippers
Zombie Town
Zombie Wars
Zombies Anonymous/Last Rites of the Dead
Zombies Gone Wild
Zombies of Sugar Hill
Zombiez (Reviewed 3-4-07)